Thank you all for your wonderful and heartfelt questions! Let’s get right into this!
- If you wanted more kids, would you have to use IVF again, or would you be able to get pregnant by yourself?
Unfortunately for us, Ashley’s endometriosis has compromised her reproductive organs, our first and only IVF cycle was our last. That was one of the hardest things to process when the doctor told us that information the day of implantation. If we were to grow our family anymore, we would have to use a surrogate, or adoption. We’ll see what the future holds!
2. You both are very devout in you faith; I’m wondering why you didn’t take infertility as a sign that bearing biological children wasn’t in His plan for you?
It absolutely was in his plan, and in his time, not ours. That is what faith is all about. Looking beyond what we know or comprehend, and choosing to believe something better is possible. That is exactly our story. Something better was possible. We’re living it right now!
3. How did you save for fertility treatments on top of regular life and bills?
It was very difficult. We were both working so hard, and I was finishing school. We really didn’t have the extra money we needed to pay for our infertility journey. We knew we needed to save, and that would take a tremendous amount of time at the pace we were going. We did cut back on several things, eating out, trips, movies, anything we didn’t need; but it still wasn’t enough. Ashley started sewing and making her own headbands that we sold at fertility runs and random events. That helped a lot, but still didn’t put us on the doorstep of paying for the IVF cycle we needed. Honestly, our prayers were answered many times over. Several friends and family saw our struggle and hard work, and donated to our cause. We were very blessed to take what we had saved, along with the generous donations that were made, and come up with the exact amount of our IVF cycle. Our faith again had been tested, but also renewed. This was a cycle we would see over and over during our fertility struggles.
4. How do you stay positive?
We relied on each other, and found a constant companion in our savior Jesus Christ. We grew to learn empathy and patience along with learning to communicate and understand each other’s love languages and needs. That was the beginning. As our marriage grew stronger as we leaned on each other, we began to rely on our faith. As we did that, we grew to understand our savior Jesus Christ better than we ever had before. He was the one person who knew EXACTLY how we were feeling. He knew our pain, our trials, and our hearts. He had suffered everything we had, and more. He was the answer to our prayers. We knew that we could rely on his comfort and love to bring us not only through our infertility struggles, but everything life would throw at us. Our marriage grew stronger, our work ethic increased, our attitudes changed, and we began to see the light of our faith with a perfect vision. We were on a path, and there was no way we were getting off.
5. What is the cost for a fertility treatment?
This can vary dramatically depending on your diagnosis or cause of infertility. Some men/women just need to be on medication; it can be as simple as a hormonal imbalance. Some need more invasive treatments as we did due to causes like endometriosis. Some couples both struggle, and both the men and women need some sort of treatment. There can be so many factors, I couldn’t give you one ballpark answer. A fertility specialist would be able to diagnose and give the best treatment options as well as cost.
6. How many eggs did you get at your retrieval?
We harvested 16, which was actually low for the average. Only nine were able to fertilize. Only two made it to the transfer day. Those were the two we put back. Those were our miracles. Unfortunately, we did not have any that made it to be able to freeze.
7. Going through infertility, how do you feel about abortions?
Ashley and I are both Pro-Life. We always have been, and we always will be. Infertility only strengthened that position.
8. Would you ever have any more kids?
God has been so very giving to us. He has blessed our lives with four very beautiful and healthy miracles. We didn’t even know if we would be able to have one. We’ve always found that when we follow his plan, keeping our faith in him, we are blessed. If he chose to bless our family with more children, it would only be more blessings for us. God is perfect in his time and in his knowledge. He knows our hearts, our strengths and our limits. That is why we have faith in him and his timing.
I really hope you all enjoyed this blog as much as we enjoyed answering these fine questions! You all are so special and such a huge part of our lives. Thank you for the continued support! I hope these thoughts were as much of a help to someone out there, as you all have been to us! We love you!
Don’t miss today’s vlog below!